Holding the Parent: Creating Warmth in the Early Years
When my daughter was a baby, I used to go to a Parent and Child group in London and I remember it as a sanctuary. Parents would be handed a warm cup of tea at arrival and despite a multitude of families with babies and toddlers, it was a calm space. The wonderful woman in her 60s who ran the groups, would frequently tuck exhausted mothers up on the sofa. It made all the difference. We were made to feel safe and held by her. She and the space radiated an incredible warmth.
I have been running Parent and Child groups myself for many years now and warmth is one of the most important aspects I consider in everything I do. It is a core element, deeply embedded in Waldorf early childhood settings. We create soul-warmth for example, with our attitudes and thoughts, by regulating our nervous system, with gentle touch and being present. A warm environment can be a space that is beautiful, calm (not always quiet), restful, non judgmental, unhurried and protected from sensory overwhelm. All this is held by a simple rhythm, because predictability is safety.
This inner warmth is not only essential for young children, it matters profoundly for parents too. Parents today are often isolated and exhausted. It is a real challenge to create warmth in our homes when we are depleted. This is partly because, in nuclear families we frequently lack community support. We are lucky to be part of a community like Michael Hall, where many families are dedicated to creating the (otherwise mythical) “village”. In order to create a sense of warmth at home, we need the support of our communities around us. Supporting parents with young children is everyone's responsibility.
As a Parent and Child teacher I see myself as part of building that village. I want to create a space where parents can come as they are, feel held, nourished (physically and emotionally), to breath out, be. It is a warm space for babies and toddlers to make some of their first social experiences and it is also a space for parents to encounter warmth and connection. The child deeply feels the inner warmth (or lack thereof) of the adults around them. What might it look like when new families are wrapped in a protective mantle of warmth, love and support?
I believe, when parents are supported and nourished by their communities, they become the healthy soil from which their children can grow.
Anna (Cochran) Schmidt
If you are a parent of children under 4, I would love to invite you for a free taster to one of our sessions.
Our sessions run Monday - Friday 9.45 - 11.45. Enquire here.
I’m looking forward to welcoming you to our parent and child community
